


The Worst

by InfernalPume



Category: Star vs. The Forces Of Evil
Genre: Anxiety, BPD, Dysphoria, F/F, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Jealousy, Other, Transgender, almost more then anxiety, awkward!, boardering on paranoia on marco's part, but majority are ocs, friends with benefits at some point?, i would like to emphasize how much these two are failing at getting together, little implied relationships of the main cast on the side, origin story for my little blog
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2017-01-06
Packaged: 2018-09-11 16:32:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8998441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InfernalPume/pseuds/InfernalPume
Summary: It wasn’t even just him being an asshole at this point, Tom was just kind of the worst. Worst at making friends, worst at keeping them, worst at pretending he didn’t care when they drifted apart. Out of anyone Marco knew, she had to be the worst. Worst at expressing herself, worst at relationships, all around just the worst. In short, they are both really bad at this.





	1. The Worst

She hated him. He was undeniably unavoidably _sure_ that she hated him.

 

Why did it have to be like this? Why couldn’t he just have _one_ relationship without ruining everything? It always happened just as he was getting comfortable too; _just_ as he was sure that someone didn’t completely hate his guts he went and- …did whatever it was that made Marco keep canceling on him.

 

To be fair Tom wasn’t exactly sure what had happened, or even when it had happened. Their interactions had already been amicably hostile in a comfortable and satisfying sort of way. Marco and Tom would both dryly comment on their mutual dislike of each other just as easily as asking what toppings to get on a pizza, they’d crack jokes at each other’s expense without worrying about hurt feelings. Or maybe that’s just how Tom thought things were. Maybe Marco was holding out for him to start treating her with respect- maybe she’d only been _putting up_ with him all this time. Maybe he’d gone and crossed a line without realizing it.

 

Tom stared at his compact mirror phone; gripping the chair he sat in with his leg bouncing so ferociously it was a blur. It had been exactly ten minutes since he last sent a non-committal ‘hey’ and eight since the message turned green, signifying she had read it. He tried to think of excuses as to why she might not be answering, tried to _avoid_ scrolling up to count how many times he repeated greetings only to be ignored. He stubbornly told himself he’d wait until she responded before sending another, when it didn’t come he put the phone down to try and do something else. However, just as he got up her chatbox turned orange, meaning she was typing something. Tom sad back down abruptly and waited, watching as the chatbox flashed from orange to white as apparently Marco kept writing and rewriting the message. To try and ease her into being more comfortable he sent her another saying that it was cool if she was busy he was just being polite. This didn’t work. She didn’t answer after that.

 

Tom huffed out some smoke and chucked the mirror at a wall. His mirror case, a living shell creature that was a gift from Star, noticed its trajectory and braced for impact so as not to break the glass. It really had been a thoughtful gift, but Tom didn’t feel like being touched right now.

 

As he paced in circles Tom recited lines from Brian and the self help books he bought after ‘graduating’ from the anger management course. He could very easily snap his fingers and be in her dorm room, but that would probably just make her more pissed at him then she already was. Marco still hadn’t answered his last message, and he had already _asked_ if she was mad at him before to be met with no response. Of course she wouldn’t tell him if she was. People don’t just _say_ “Oh yeah I hate you now stop messaging me.”

 

Tom didn’t even know why he _cared_ so much. Sure he and Marco were close but his stuff happened literally all the time. Usually this sort of behavior worsened it as well, so maybe if he just stopped acting _crazy_ long enough for things to cool over-

 

And then he got a new message and was back to pouring over his phone.

 

It was pathetic really, pathetic how he immediately started acting aloof all over again. Casually acting superior while pretending he _didn’t_ leave a million messages in the dead of night only to insist they were for someone else in the morning. It wasn’t even just him being an asshole at this point, he was just kind of the _worst._ Worst at making friends, worst at keeping them, worst at pretending he didn’t care when they drifted apart.

 

But still he couldn’t help but try to do everything in his power to make sure things were still ‘cool’ whilst exhibiting no chill whatsoever. When Marco offhandedly asked if he wanted to hang out his immediate response was to refuse, before kicking himself and trying to think of a laid back way to let her know he’d be free. In his heart he knew she didn’t fall for it, it was all he could do to hope she didn’t tell anyone else how sad this display has become.

 

 

 

Marco’s breath caught in her throat at the lofty rejection, fighting to think of something to say without sounding too desperate. Ever since that stupid merchap incident it’s been harder and harder to talk to him. She would like to think that some absurdly lame gesture didn’t warrant a crush on her best friend’s ex, so she said that it was just a starting point and there were other things. Other things that she hadn’t been able to recall because she was currently avoiding him.

 

Perhaps avoiding him was the wrong word, as it wasn’t like she was doing it on purpose. It would take her a solid five minutes to think of a response, and often Tom would grow impatient and end the conversation before she worked up the courage. Instances like these made her flop backwards on her bunk and groan in the general direction of the springs. A week ago it would have been so easy to just come up with something to say faster or insist that she still wanted to talk but now…

 

Dropping her phone Marco rolled over and gripped her pillow, hearing Marcy shift above. It was obvious the other girl had something she wanted to say on the matter, but both of them were to cowed by the situation to bring it up. Marco could only imagine it was something along the lines of ‘this entire thing is a bad idea’, which she already knew so what was even the point. At least her humiliation was silent, Marco didn’t know what she would do if someone was mad enough to convince her to go through with these feelings.

 

There were just so many reasons why she _shouldn’t._ That’s what she told herself when hesitating, anyway. For one there was Star, Star who was awesome and bubbly until you pressed her buttons, buttons you sometimes didn’t even know where _there_ until it was too late. Whilst she never had expressed any discrimination for breaking the girl code Marco didn’t put it past her to take personal offense. Even if Star was cool with it, there was also the fact that Tom probably had someone else he liked. Marco got more details then she wanted whenever he texted her by mistake, leaving a dull ache that made it impossible to talk to him. It was all she could do to make up some dumb excuse to leave the conversation while he probably knew _exactly_ how bent up she was about it. It was humiliating thinking of him being completely aware of what was going on, only ignoring it to spare her feelings. And that was the final reason, she was just so _bad_ at this.

 

It had been easy to ignore in higschool, everyone was crap at it then, but seeing herself now after having a successful relationship with Jackie there was no escaping the fact that normal people _didn’t_ act like this. Out of anyone Marco knew she had to be the worst. Worst at expressing herself, worst at relationships, all around just the _worst._

 

It took quite a bit of self-control not to jerk up when her phone buzzed again, even more to be silent at the confirmation he was free. Marco listed off all the things they could do in public places and drooped when he responded he’d rather stay home. Marco had found out the hard way she wasn’t comfortable being alone with him in his room anymore; working herself up into a panic of all the embarrassing things she hadn’t even _done_ yet and canceling last minute. It wasn’t as though she could just tell him, “Hey I’m terrified of getting too comfortable and letting something slip”, she was running out of stupid reasons to back out.

 

Just then a horrible thought hit her- what if Tom was putting two and two together? The crush she so obviously had on him and her refusal to be alone, if Tom started to suspect Marco wanted to sleep with him she might never recover. Even thinking about _thinking_ of his reaction made her want to punch a hole in her mattress.

 

 _“Actually, your place is fine,”_ she texted immediately, Marco had to get over this hurdle _now, “Is it okay if I come over later tonight?”_

There was a pause on Tom’s end, or maybe it just felt like that because Marco suddenly and irrationally thought Tom would confuse the meeting for a booty call. But he then gave a passive affirmation and Marco breathed a sigh of relief, putting the phone on her dresser. Now it was just a matter of exactly _when_ later was. She hadn’t specified, and it might be a bit to obsessive to mention it now. Of course cool-guy bad-boy Tom wouldn’t care when she swung by, but if Marco came too soon it’d give the wrong idea. She'd have to play it cool. Be natural and organic.

 

“Stupid…” she mumbled into her pillow, trying to calculate what would be the best time to set on her phone.


	2. Still the Worst

And when was “later” supposed to be anyway?

 

Tom tried to keep himself occupied at least. He hadn’t played pocketmonsters in a while, but for some reason it ticked him off to think about the game. His little meltdown over the merchamp had been his most recent emotional outburst, and even though Tom remembered it fondly Marco might not. The very idea that such a happy interaction was what tarnished their friendship forever made Tom ill. It was always so much worse when happy memories turn out sour.

 

Even still. Tom _wasn’t_ going to fuck up this time. He knew that he wasn’t, he refused to say anything rude amicably or no, refused to act desperate, and above all refused to even acknowledge that things were weird. Nothing makes something weirder then saying there’s weirdness when there isn’t any.

 

With all that in mind, checked and resolved in his head once again, Tom was back to wondering when exactly Marco would show up. Did he have time to change? Or shower? Would it be weird if he had wet hair? He hated having wet hair. It only turned to steam. Marco might get the wrong idea if steam was literally coming out of his head. It’d only take like five minutes to dry but maybe Marco would _be here_ in five minutes. When was later?

 

Tom jumped when he heard his phone buzz again, and drooped somewhat to see the first message.

 

_Sorry._

 

Tom just stared at the word for a moment while his fist shook. He was not proud of the harsh words that flashed through his mind or the desire to storm into the girl’s dormroom to teach her not to blow him off. Almost as if she knew he was angry, more messages came.

 

_My friend needs help setting up for a party, I can’t come over tonight._

 

Since when did Marco have _other friends?_ Marco didn’t tell Tom about any other friends. There was her roommate but she didn’t like Tom so Marco wouldn’t _dare_ be friends with her. Is this why Marco hadn’t been talking to him? Did she just have _millions_ of friends to hang out with all the time? Tom glared down at his phone and was halfway through typing a message thanking Marco for canceling because he _also_ had a big cool party to go to when Marco sent another.

 

_Do you want to meet up with me there? She wants us all to invite guys._

This got Tom’s attention at least. He smirked cruelly and responded before he could stop himself.

 

_Look who needs me to save her ass again. I guess I could come over. But if I’m coming your friends should save their efforts finding anyone hotter then me._

 

This was a mistake, but Tom still had his pride and wouldn’t pass up an opportunity to mess with her. Of course she didn’t respond back, but Tom pressed on despite it.

 

_When should I come over?_

 

There was a pause, such a long pause Tom began to think he was uninvited. What was _wrong_ with him? With a groan he fell back on his bed and grumbled angrily to himself. When the phone buzzed again he was almost afraid to look, but ultimately _had_ to.

 

_I don’t know, I’ll ask Annie._

 

Tom rolled his eyes. ‘Annie’ what a stupid name. Tom bet ‘Annie’ was some stuck up preppy girl. If she was throwing a party it meant she was in a house, maybe in a sorority, maybe the dean’s daughter. If Tom knew anything about college culture from movies sorority girls with important daddies were the _worst._ Tom bet this Annie was only inviting Marco over so they could do something horrible to her. Like…cover her in feathers or…make her fall in love with the protagonist. Tom’s phone cover began to wriggle its antennae nervously as his fist heated up, but he kept himself from throwing a tantrum.

 

_She says she’s not sure, around eightish_

Oh wasn’t that _nice._ Annie probably didn’t consider other people might have things to do. She didn’t _care_ that maybe someone else had a tight schedule and would appreciate a solid time to be over. Brilliant just brilliant.

 

_Well I got stuff to do today so I’m gonna need more then that._

Was that alright with her? Was that alright with _Annie?_ Maybe Tom should go over to her stupid dean’s daughter sorority house and _set it on fire._ It’d be hard to humiliate Marco when all your feathers are ash, alongside your awkward movie protagonist. No, that was a bad idea, Marco was probably over there.

 

Maybe set it on fire _after._

 

* * *

 

 

“For the last time, 8:30 but we don’t really _need_ a specific time.”

 

Marco rolled her eyes but pressed on.

 

“He likes being punctual, if he thinks he’s too early he might not show,” Marco said.

 

Annie snorted and placed a hand on Marco's shoulder.

 

“You know no one’s gonna judge you if you don’t bring anyone,” she said, “We know its been tough to get dates since you assaulted that one guy.”

 

“I didn’t assault him!” Marco shouted, cheeks darkening as she threw up her arms, “For the _millionth_ \- it was a sparring accident!”

 

“You threw him out a window.”

 

“Humans are _lighter_ then monsters!”

 

Annie chuckled to herself and went back to unpacking cups, “I wish guys respected me like they do you. You gotta teach me some of that kung-fu shit!”

 

It wasn’t even worth telling her that the accidental throw was during a Jiu-Jitsu demonstration, Marco just smirked and shook her head.

 

“Who is this guy anyway?” Annie asked after a while.

 

“Oh, he’s not from our school,” Marco said, “Or… _earth_ for that matter.”

 

This caught her attention her eyes widened and she turned to Marco with a scandalized expression.

 

“Wait, wait,” she said, “Is he one of your highschool friends? The ones from different dimensions?”

 

Marco stiffened and cocked her head to the side.

 

“Is that okay?”

 

“Are you kidding?” Annie snorted, “Last time we hung out with that unicorn head thing was a _blast!_ You should invite all of them too!”

 

“You really don’t want that,” Marco said, “Star’s starting her first year as Queen and she’s not allowed to go anywhere without a horde of guards.”

 

“So she’d be doing her part bringing more boys then,” Annie said with a wink.

 

Marco rolled her eyes. “So 8:30?”

 

“You’re mental, Marco,” Annie said, “And tell him we also think your obsession with time is completely weird.”

 

With a blush and a nod Marco sent the message to Tom, who only responded that he might be able to make it. Feeling stupid and giddy Marco put down her phone to help Annie and the other girls set up.

 

It turned out the party was going to start a lot earlier then any of them expected. Julie's boyfriend and his friends showed up with the beer, and already they were all sitting in a circle laughing and drinking before the sun had even gone down. Marco stayed silent until Annie mentioned that a literal demon was showing up, which lead to the conversation of how he had been invited, to how Marco had met him, to Marco's adventures as a teenager. Marco had never been much of a storyteller, but so long as she focused on Star's part of the adventures it was easy enough to keep the story going.

 

It was strange being the center of attention, not nearly as terrifying as Marco had remembered it being. She was just through explaining how they won the spellbook back from Ludo when another wave of party guests arrived, completely ruining the suspense. Marco tried to finish the story as people loudly greeted each other, but ultimately realized the effort was wasted. Once again Marco was quieted, quietly sipping a cola as everyone gossiped about the first month back from winter break. 

 

Time passed and slowly more and more people came. Out of everyone Marco only knew Annie and a few others, she sat on a sofa in the back quietly and remembered she  _hated_ these sorts of parties. Marco felt much more at home at holiday or dinner parties, structured activities and traditions to help introduce everyone. Without the small circle of friends this social jungle felt so much more intimidating. Soon it was dark out and the loud music was starting to make Marco feel a bit queasy. She had promised herself that she'd stick around at one of these till at  _least_ midnight, but already she was starting to wish she had hung out with Tom instead.

 

Speaking of, shouldn't he be here by now? Marco checked her phone and groaned. It was only 7. She lay back on the sofa and stared at the ceiling, calling her self a million kinds of stupid. 

 

"Hey, you're Diaz, right?"

 

Marco sat up and looked about, seeing a guy she recognized from the fencing club. She nodded and tried to sip her drink but found it empty. Was it awkward to go throw something away in the middle of a conversation? Marco really wanted to talk to _someone,_ god that was a pathetic way to think about it.

 

"Yeah, thats me," she finally came up with.

 

The guy grinned and sat down next to her.

 

"Bout time, that douche has been hogging the club room because his dad's on the board. Now the practice schedule is more fair."

 

Marco sighed. "I'm glad someone benefits from me being kicked out."

 

"I thought you were graciously persuaded to leave."

 

"I was kicked out."

 

The boy laughed and stuck out a hand, "Name's Hunter."

 

Marco glanced up and down at the boy, staring at his bright green converse and ending with his thick classes and half shaved haircut. He  _looked_ like someone called Hunter all right. She managed to keep herself from snorting out a laugh. She took the hand and shook.

 

"Hey, ever thought about fencing? You have the build for it."

 

Marco stiffened at the question. Marco wasn't sure what kind of body a fencer had but she didn't like to think of anyone staring at hers long enough to make the connection. Hunter's brows rose and he put up his hands.

 

"That was weird wasn't it. That was totally weird."

 

"N-no," Marco said, rubbing an arm, "No I just...I have this can its empty and I don't wanna leave it here so I'll just..." 

 

She got up and made her escape to the garbage can, then to hide outside on the porch. Absently she looked up at the stars and wondered what her best friend was up to. Star probably would have been overjoyed at this invitation, her mom was driving her crazy lately. But her guards weren't the only reason Marco had neglected to invite her. Whenever Star was around she had a habit of sucking up the attention. Marco wouldn't have minded it, but for some reason she had it in her head she'd be the belle of this particular ball. Why she might have wanted that was  _beyond_ her, well maybe not.

 

Maybe she wanted to show Tom that  _other_ people liked her. That he wasn't the only person taking up all of her time. He liked to send stupid messaged to his friends in the middle of the night talking about how much he valued and cared about them, Marco hated that Tom had this whole network of people that obviously mattered more to him then Marco did. Hated how excited she got when one of those messages ended up in her inbox by accident. With a sigh she got up to go find Hunter again. He admitted that what he said was a mistake, and Marco knew better then anyone how to put her foot in her mouth. 

 

With a deep breath she entered the house again, ready to pretend she was cool for just one night. 


End file.
